5.18.2009

Nice Guys Finish Last/Part 3.

The other day, a female friend of mine stated: "Nice guys finish last because they choose to." I agree because yeah, we do chose to be nice all the time and call it a loss in the end.

There are several reasons why Nice Guys lose. I feel there has to be some mystery. Each person needs to be their own person. We fall in love with their individuality and once it becomes altered, the relationship falters. Nice guys finish last because there is no mystery. A girl will take it for granted that a nice guy is always there, one of her utmost reliable friends, charming, charismatic, respectable, and fun. A girl doesn't want to be with a predictable guy. There has to be some uncertainty: Will he still love me if I'm not perfect? Am I of priority to him? What do I mean to him? It doesn't make sense why a girl would want a guy who treats her like she's nothing special. I think it's because a girl doesn't want predictable. And predictable is not exciting. And in order to get that first date or even a sign of attraction, you must excite. Nice guys do and give everything without her doing anything so why would she put a high value on him? A girl wants a guy who's ego and self worth remains untouched no matter her response or reaction to what he says or does.

When a woman does not need the attention of a nice guy to feel complete and strong, the relationship will have a sturdy foundation because each of their personalities compliment each other. She can be her own woman and spare the nice guy because she won't be in need of what the nice guy has to offer. So, a nice guy is a tool box that remains open. Lending tools out only to have them returned broken.

I've seen this happen far too many times. A beautiful girl takes and takes the tools-either doesn't return them or returns them broken. She finds someone attractive and gets with them for the wrong reasons. He subconsciously lowers her self-esteem (kat williams) and damages the value of her heart. That equates to a broken woman. A broken woman loses touch of her morals, loses herself and damages her foundation. The nice guy remains intact, ready to give everything he has to offer to another girl. One of two things happens: He finds a new girl who shares mutual feelings, or the broken girl who initially took advantage of his feelings comes back because of that rare dependability.
Both parties learn a valuable lesson nonetheless.
For the guys, state your intent from the jump and don't change your morals for anyone. The person who you are should be accepted, not the things you do to be seen as a decent guy.
For the girls, be your own woman and use careful discretion with whom you choose to begin a relationship.

If you would either like to inform me that I'm wrong on anything I said, if you agree or disagree, or dare to debate me about these statements, text, email, AIM, or myspace me. Any input is appreciated.

2 comments:

J.Ford said...

Though you do make SOME good points, I disagree with your main point.

Nice guys DO NOT finish last.

Usually when the girl leave the "Nice Guy" for her "Bad Boy", it's just to pacify a fantasy or for something not so boring and more exciting. . The whole " choke me, Spank me, pull my hair, and call me a bitch".

The problem with that is, that SOME "bad boys" don't know or don't give two shits about what the girl wants or needs. And puts other priorities over her.
... And eventually she ends up heart broken and hating, and calling them doggs and all that other shit that goes along with that.

So, It feel it is the girl who actually "finishes last" or misses out on something that could have possibly enriched her life. Haha.

Kause good dudes provide enichment for these hoes!
(j/k ladies)

Another problem is that, most of us good dude( had to include myslf) are sensitive in one form or another, so when we've lose something that we put so mUch sweat and effort into, it hurts!
..so, as a result it makes us feel as if we've failed or "finished last. But in reality, we got rid of a person who is more than likely insecure, emotionally unstable and probably doesn't even know what she wants. So we WIN!

I'm not bashing an women, but, when we are young those are the things we go through. Our emotions are often going through loops, and we usually don't know what it is that we be or want..

So in conclusion, nice guys DO NOT finish last. Nor do women for that matter. Losses and gains should be taken as lessons and learn from them. You only lose if you think you've lost. It's about our mindset.

..soak that up.

Maelove said...

I agreee, and hi dedan(=